Time to De-clutter

Good morning sunshines! I hope this day finds you all well. I know Im slow getting back here. Yall have to excuse me, its been a bit busy here lately. We had a birthday, so I’m not the mother of a 17 year old. One more year yall and shes graduating. 😉 My mom heart is so happy. that will make 2 down and 2 to go. I cannot wait! lol. We also had Mardi Gras so I had to bring the kids to the parades and all because if I dont then who will? Especially since they have let me know that i’m the “fun” parent. lmfao. Yall know that little ego booster made my day. Im so used to being the mean parent thats always fussing and pissing people off because I require them to be decent human beings. Its good to know that regardless of all my fussing they still like to be around me. That warms my momma heart. 🙂 In addition to that, I’m still fighting with my lung health. Its crazy how one day you can be doing good and the next you cant breathe for shit. One of my clients asked me if I had COPD, I told him not that I know, but honestly yall I was thinking the same thing myself. So the next time I go back to see my doctor imma make sure to ask about that.

On another note, I wanted to share with yall some of my other progress. I have been on a personal mission to de-clutter my home. Yall im so stressed all the time and I think its because I have been living in excess. I realize I have some packrat tendencies and I do not like it. SO as of lately, I have been getting rid of what no longer is being used in my home and let me tell yall, its a lot. I have a habit of holding on to things because I hate to throw good things away and I always like to help others when I can. I realize this is creating a problem for me. Theres so much unused junk laying everywhere that I cannot properly function within my own home. Sitting in a room full of stuff after you have had a trying day at work or school only adds to your stress. I know thats the case for me, so I assume its the same for everyone else including my kids. So yesterday I decided to tackle my kitchen. Yall Im so proud of myself and im not even finished. I had this huge wire shelf that I got on clearance for $7 and I thought it was such an awesome deal so I bought it without knowing the dimensions of the shelf. Well when I took it out of the box, I was like omg, wtf? This shelf was 75 inches tall. Thats a little over 6 feet yall. I wasnt ready. lol. Yall know im only 5’4″ so everything on that top shelf is off limits to ya girl without a step stool. lol. Speaking of I need to go get a bigger step stool because I put some stuff in those tiny little cabinets over the fridge, yall know the ones that you only really put stuff that you are literally never gonna use because who the hell can reach that shit? That must have been vreated by some man to make his wifes life difficult. lol. Anyways, I’m using them to hide my stash from my kids. lol. Even with a step stool, they cant get up there. 🙂 More goodies for me, but not too many cause yall know im still tryna get this weight off me. Thats been a struggle too cause not feeling the best and all of the mess going on, I been putting it back on. 😦 We will talk about that in a bit, back to this cleaning. So yeah, I moved the monster shelf, which was fairly heavy, into my garage and put it at the bottom of the steps where I put all of my drinks and some kitchen appliances and some of my baking things in some of thos plastic shoebox storage containers. I think imma get some more of those and organize everyones slosets a little better. I might get some and actually store my shoes in them so I can take this big rubbermaid bin out of my closet. its overflowing and messy. In the spot where the shelf was in the kitchen I put a little table with some bar stools to offer alternate seating. I think my kids will enjoy this because they often fight because they done wanna sit next to one another so especially at homework time they can each sit at different tables. This might help to increase the overall level of peace in the house, which is my number one goal. A peaceful, stress free environment to recharge and rest and enjoy. I feel like my home right now is in a somewhat organized level of chaos, so Im working to get it to a better place. My feng shui is off. I think I need more cows on my walls. lol. They bring me peace. Oh I have a huge cow picture that i got at big lots on clearance for $17 which is a steal because hobby lobby has some that arent even as big and they are over $40. Theres no way. Yall know I like my bargains, sometimes a little too much because I end up buying unnecessary junk just because its cheap. This behavior has to stop. Thats anothere thing im trying to work on this year. No more impulse buying. I have to get a bit more disciplined. Gotta get back on saving my cash and look into a retirement account. Thats always a concern for me because my job doesnt offer a 401k so I have nothing really saved for later. Everytime I get ahead, something major happens and wipes out my little bit of change and im back at square one. We have to do better at managing it all. I know I have some impulsive tendencies that I need to work on getting under control. Im the type of person that if it pops in my head and I wanna do it, I do. After all we only live once. I just need to work on finding the balane between enjoying my life and saving for my future. Everyday is a new opportunity to do better.

With that being said, lets talk about this health journey. Yall I’m not gonna lie, this shit is hard. I was doing so good and then it was like I hit a brick wall. I get so frustrated with myself when I get sick and I cant breath because its stopping me from doing so much that I need to do and yall know if I cant get the shit done that I have on my mental list, Im sooooo not happy. Sometimes I’m easier on myself than other times, but it still pisses me off. A lot of people dont understand it, but when you are one person carrying a load of many, you tend to have higher expectations for yourself than you should. Im trying to learn to be kinder to me. I had a conversation with a client just last week about this. I was leaving her house and she asked what I was gonna do that evening and I was like, I need to go home and clean up my own house. I have so much that I’d like to do, and she told me that I need to go pick up my child and go home to rest. I tried to explain to her that I cant just rest, I have to do something because if I dont, in my head, im being lazy. All idle time is an opportunity for me to be productive. Because I have so much on my to do list, if I can knock one or two tasks off my list, im doing good. I think I got that nervous energy from my dad. He always had to be doing something and I find im the same way. If im not being productive, im failing myself. Its crazy, because I know I do a lot more than the average person on a daily basis, but sometimes its still not enough. This year, imma be nicer to me and I’m gonna listen a bit more to my body and my loved ones when they tell me to rest. Yesterday I sent my mom a video of the kitchen before I started and shes like dont do too much cause you dont sound good. Im like its ok ill be fine. I sent the same video to my friend and my daughter and they both said I sounded terrible, I was like wtf, im ok. Im over here knocking this shit out. Yall I sat down and listened to my breathing in that video and liked to die laughing. I was like who the fuck is this? My sister said I sound like I should be filming for an episode of my 600 pound life. LMFAO My daughter said she was bout to send me an ambulance. lol. I liked to die. SO when I got finished I blew the dust out my nose and went took a breathing treatment. Today imma take an allergy pill because the dust and dander makes my breathing worse. The kitchen is the only room that doesnt have an air purifier running in it, so I guess I have to go get another one for in there. Always something. But Im alright yall. dont worry. Back to my weight loss journey, I put my weight back on yall. the scall said 224.2 this morning. I was disgusted, but not discouraged. Just gotta get back on track and get it back off. Imma go hang my cow pic and snap a pic for yall to see then ill post this. Thanks for listening. I hope you all have an amazing day. Hugs and love always.

Yall ignore my mix-matched stools. lol. Just enjoy Hildie in all her glory. Shes so pretty. 🙂